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Talking to the boys about their memories

We recently celebrated our fifth anniversary as a family. Five years doesn't sound very long, but in context it represents more than half Lyall and Richard's lives spent with their two dads. So, it was a big one!

This year our family birthday coincided (within a few weeks) with Grandpa Mark and Aunty Emily's birthdays, Easter and Grandpa Pam's bi-annual visit to the UK. So, quite a celebration! The boys love their family birthday - like the Queen we celebrate our extra birthday with a tasty lunch.

Daddy and Dad, Lyall and Richard celebrating their family birthday at the Old Mill Pub
Family birthday! Left to right - Grandma Jenny, Grandma Pam, Aunty Emily, Richard, Daddy, Dad, Lyall, Uncle Mark

When we adopted Rich and Lyall, they were already old enough to know what was happening and they have memories of their past lives; memories we like to keep alive. With that in mind, we keep a discussion open about the boys' past, especially memories of their penultimate home (with their lovely foster carers) and the early days of their placement with us.

On the school run this morning, I had an interesting chat with Lyall and Richard about their very earliest memories. Lyall's convinced he can remember being born (although I'm sure that's just an effort to beat Richard's first memory), while Richard's earliest memory is eating custard doughnuts on a beach on holiday when he was three. Probing deeper into Richard's memory, he also remembers he was with his foster-carer, Lindsey and Lyall and he vividly remembers the Portuguese man who sold the doughnuts on the beach. Dark curly hair and tattoos, apparently.

Lyall also remembers the doughnuts which is no surprise as he has a photographic memory of everything he's ever consumed on holiday or on a day out since he was about two years old. That's no exaggeration - every time we re-visit somewhere he's been as a little'un he'll surprise us with a detailed account of a blackcurrant sorbet, chicken tikka sarnie or even a bruised apple. It's incredible!

We didn't know the boys before we were placed with them, in fact we don't actually have any photographs or confirmed stories from their pre-threes so Tom and I are fascinated by the boys' first-hand memories.

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